Wednesday, November 24, 2010

A Young Viagra Salesman Sees Lust Turn Into Love

Since most romantic comedies take place in a perky, generic present, you may be surprised to see a note in the opening titles informing you that the action in “Love & Other Drugs” starts in 1996. Why so specific? Is there some world-historical event looming on the horizon that will change the characters’ lives forever? Or does the director, Edward Zwick, simply want to evoke a bygone-but-not-too-distant era when a young person could have a lot of fun and make a lot of money without worrying too much about whatever it is young people nowadays worry about (war, terrorism, recession, Facebook)?

Related
It’s the Relationships, Stupid (November 21, 2010) The answer is, to some extent, both. The year 1996 was, among other things, that of “Jerry Maguire,” and in its freewheeling, fast-moving first act, “Love & Other Drugs” seems to be staking out similar thematic territory. (It also has some affinities with the more recent and somber “Up in the Air”).

We are introduced to Jamie Randall (Jake Gyllenhaal), a fellow brimming with self-confidence and cheerful aggression but not quite sure what to do with himself besides sell stuff (home electronics and then pharmaceuticals) and sleep with a lot of women. The underachieving son of an eminent Chicago doctor — Jamie’s sister is also in medicine, while his brother is a geeky software millionaire — Jamie has more charm than ambition. He’s a Clinton-era free spirit: feckless, a bit lost, waiting to see what kind of luck or love comes his way, but never doubting that something will.

Which brings us to the world-historical event that makes Jamie’s fortune and takes some pressure off the screenwriters (who are Mr. Zwick, his longtime collaborator Marshall Herskovitz and Charles Randolph, author of “The Life of David Gale,” among other things.) In 1998, you may recall, the real-life company Pfizer, the fictional Jamie’s employer, began marketing sildenafil citrate under the brand name Viagra. The rest is late-night talk show monologue history, and the filmmakers are not too proud to stoop to some easy, naughty and in some cases very funny jokes and gags, including an extended sequence involving the drug’s most notorious side effect.

Supply your own double entendre here. I’m not really allowed to. But “Love & Other Drugs” does not really stand or fall on the basis of its smutty, sexual humor. It does have some elements likely to be cherished by connoisseurs of coarse laughs, notably Jamie’s younger brother, Josh (Josh Gad), who is the tubby, shlubby, erotically challenged (if not downright gross) sidekick every big-screen player seems to need.

But low farce is only one substance in the film’s dispensary. “Love & Other Drugs” is a sometimes intoxicating, sometimes headache-inducing cocktail: a sweet, libidinous love story; a candid comedy of bedroom and workplace manners; and, most bravely, if also most jarringly, a medical melodrama involving a chronic and very serious disease.

Assigned to a rusty, reasonably picturesque stretch of the American heartland (and to a supervisor played by the reliably put-upon Oliver Platt), Jamie tries to persuade a hot-shot doctor (Hank Azaria) to prescribe Pfizer’s drug Zoloft instead of Prozac. The task has some perils (being punched out by a rival played by Gabriel Macht), and a few perks as well (going to bed with one of the doctor’s receptionists, played by Judy Greer). It also brings about a cute meeting with Maggie Murdock (Anne Hathaway), who sees right through Jamie’s game (not long after he peeks at her breasts) and plays along with it anyway.

Maggie is an artist (she seems to have moved into Melissa’s loft from “thirtysomething,” which remains Mr. Zwick and Mr. Herskovitz’s best work), an adventurer, and a bit of a cynic in matters of the heart. She also has early-onset Parkinson’s disease, an affliction that casts a complicated shadow over her relationship with Jamie and gives the movie a gravity it does not quite know how to handle. Now and then she experiences tremors and bouts of self-pity, but most of all her illness makes her wary of growing too close to Jamie and provides an explanation for her no-strings, commitment-shy approach to intimacy.

Ms. Hathaway and Mr. Gyllenhaal are frequently delightful to watch, and their ease together is a rebuke to the self-conscious, emotionally cautious protocols of modern movie romance. They look good in what might be considered period clothes — wayfarer sunglasses and crisp suits for him, waifish ensembles of knitted layers for her — and also in their birthday suits. Jamie and Maggie have fun in the sack, and on the floor, and wherever else the mood strikes. Their intense and almost immediate sexual connection opens the door to emotions that neither is quite prepared for but that neither wants to resist, and the actors are at their most appealing and persuasive when they explore the borderland between ardor and ambivalence.

But there is an asymmetry in the way the characters are conceived that undermines the film’s credibility. We know a lot about Jamie’s temperament, his ambitions and his background. His parents, played by George Segal and Jill Clayburgh (in her last film appearance), are on screen briefly, but they ground Jamie in a social and familial milieu and help us understand who he is.

Maggie, in contrast, is less a person than a sentimental, fairy-tale conceit: a tragic affliction, an artistic attitude and an unchecked libido conjured out of thin air to test her lover’s resolve and deepen his soul. That she often seems like more is entirely to Ms. Hathaway’s credit.

And it is to Mr. Zwick’s credit that “Love & Other Drugs” almost works, sustaining its blend of melodrama, low comedy and graceful wit for a good hour or so, but then succumbing to treacle, evasion and maudlin convention at the end. Unfortunately the effects of the movie, therapeutic and intoxicating though they are, wear off before it is over.

“Love & Other Drugs” is rated R (Under 17 requires accompanying parent or adult guardian). A lot of sex, some (mostly legal) drugs.

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Differ LOVE AND LUST

LUST IS EXTRA DIMENTION WHICH CREATE DYNAMIC POWER TO LOVE> LOVE IS SIMPLE AND PLEASE>

Sunday, February 28, 2010

Charge up to Love and Lust Alive


Do all seasoned relationships lose their sizzle over time? Not necessarily. Remember the high you felt when you first fell in love? That heady cloud nine feeling? Although you still love your partner, you still care for him or her, you still feel secure and comfortable with him or her, the lust, the romance, the passion no longer lights your flame.

What is missing is the dopamine rush─ the brain chemical that promotes ecstatic pleasure ─ the testosterone, oxytocin, vasopressin, endogenous opiods ─ that enhance love, lust, romance, and passion. In case you think this waning of passion is inevitable, think again. No matter the rut you are in, no matter how dispirited you feel, no matter the short supply of the good mood neurotransmitter Serotonin, you can change all of that.
You can bring romance and passion back. In the process a cascade of good mood, love, and lust brain chemicals will bathe your partner and you. The first step is to clear the deck of old stumbling blocks so that you can bring fresh experience on deck. When you change your mind, you will change your brain.

Here's how.

In my practice bringing love and lust back takes a back seat to letting go of the anger, the disappointments, the hurt of the past. You must resolve all of this first. It took two of you to get into this place so it will take the two of you to get out of it. Here then are some tips.

Communicate your feelings to your partner with "I" statements that do not attack or blame him. The listen to his side of the story.

Climb on board with him, allow yourself to walk in his shoes, to empathize with him. Then and only then can the process of forgiveness begin. Did you know that the brain houses empathy and forgiveness in the same cortices? That means as you empathize with him, you can forgive him.

As soon as you feel more at ease with your partner, the train carrying romance, lust and passion can get on track. What charges up the engine is novelty.
Change begins in the imagination. First you fantasize and then you enact the following:.
• Fantasize the verbal and sensual foreplay at a distance from your partner. Text, call, or email one another. Experience the thrill of expectations for him or her. Put it into action. When you begin making love, rather than consummating the sex act, let foreplay linger on and on so that longing mounts.

• Surrender to the feelings that arise in you as you surrender to your partner. The magic arises when you lose yourself in your partner only to find yourself.

• If you have always made love in your bed, imagine making love in a hot air balloon, in the shower, naked on a sunny beach, or any other romantic novel places that come to mind. Then pick some of these places, invite your partner to your hot spot and go for it.

• Imagine making love in different positions and in different ways and then try these novel ways of love-making.

• How about time of day or night? If love-making was reserved for after dinner when the dishes were done, leave them in the sink. How about love in the morning, at noon, or in the afternoon?

These are only some suggestions that may or may not register with you. My hope is that you are inspired to create your own novelty to spice up a lack-luster relationship. Life is not forever, but love and lust can make each precious moment of it more vibrant, vital, and fulfilling.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

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gurumia.com